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hitherto； while gathering up the discourse of mr。 brocklehurst and miss temple； i had not； at the same time； neglected precautions to secure my personal safety； which i thought would be effected； if i could only elude observation。 to this end； i had sat well back on the form； and while seeming to be busy with my sum； had held my slate in such a manner as to conceal my face： i might have escaped notice； had not my treacherous slate somehow happened to slip from my hand； and falling with an obtrusive crash； directly drawn every eye upon me； i knew it was all over now； and； as i stooped to pick up the two fragments of slate； i rallied my forces for the worst。 it came。
“a careless girl！” said mr。 brocklehurst； and immediately after—“it is the new pupil； i perceive。” and before i could draw breath； “i must not forget i have a word to say respecting her。” then aloud： how loud it seemed to me！ “let the child who broke her slate e forward！”
of my own accord i could not have stirred； i was paralysed： but the two great girls who sit on each side of me； set me on my legs and pushed me towards the dread judge； and then miss temple gently assisted me to his very feet； and i caught her whispered counsel—
“don’t be afraid； jane； i saw it was an accident； you shall not be punished。”
the kind whisper went to my heart like a dagger。
“another minute； and she will despise me for a hypocrite；” thought i； and an impulse of fury against reed； brocklehurst； and co。 bounded in my pulses at the conviction。 i was no helen burns。
“fetch that stool；” said mr。 brocklehurst； pointing to a very high one from which a monitor had just risen： it was brought。
“place the child upon it。”
and i was placed there； by whom i don’t know： i was in no condition to note particulars； i was only aware that they had hoisted me up to the height of mr。 brocklehurst’s nose； that he was within a yard of me； and that a spread of shot orange and purple silk pelisses and a cloud of silvery plumage extended and waved below me。
mr。 brocklehurst hemmed。
“ladies；” said he； turning to his family； “miss temple； teachers； and children； you all see this girl？”
of course they did； for i felt their eyes directed like burning… glasses against my scorched skin。
“you see she is yet young； you observe she possesses the ordinary form of childhood； god has graciously given her the shape that he has given to all of us； no signal deformity points her out as a marked character。 who would think that the evil one had already found a servant and agent in her？ yet such； i grieve to say； is the case。”
a pause—in which i began to steady the palsy of my nerves； and to feel that the rubicon was passed； and that the trial； no longer to be shirked； must be firmly sustained。
“my dear children；” pursued the black marble clergyman； with pathos； “this is a sad； a melancholy occasion； for it bees my duty to warn you； that this girl； who might be one of god’s own lambs； is a little castaway： not a member of the true flock； but evidently an interloper and an alien。 you must be on your guard against her； you must shun her example； if necessary； avoid her pany； exclude her from your sports； and shut her out from your converse。 teachers； you must watch her： keep your eyes on her movements； weigh well her words； scrutinise her actions； punish her body to save her soul： if； indeed； such salvation be possible； for （my tongue falters while i tell it） this girl； this child； the native of a christian land； worse than many a little heathen who says its prayers to brahma and kneels before juggernaut—this girl is—a liar！”
now came a pause of ten minutes； during which i； by this time in perfect possession of my wits； observed all the female brocklehursts produce their pocket…handkerchiefs and apply them to their optics； while the elderly lady swayed herself to and fro； and the two younger ones whispered； “how shocking！” mr。 brocklehurst resumed。
“this i learned from her benefactress； from the pious and charitable lady who adopted her in her orphan state； reared her as her own daughter； and whose kindness； whose generosity the unhappy girl repaid by an ingratitude so bad； so dreadful； that at last her excellent patroness was obliged to separate her from her own young ones； fearful lest her vicious example should contaminate their purity： she has sent her here to be healed； even as the jews of old sent their diseased to the troubled pool of bethesda； and； teachers； superintendent； i beg of you not to allow the waters to stagnate round her。”
with this sublime conclusion； mr。 brocklehurst adjusted the top button of his surtout； muttered something to his family； who rose； bowed to miss temple； and then all the great people sailed in state from the room。 turning at the door； my judge said—
“let her stand half…an…hour longer on that stool； and let no one speak to her during the remainder of the day。”
there was i； then； mounted aloft； i； who had said i could not bear the shame of standing on my natural feet in the middle of the room； was now exposed to general view on a pedestal of infamy。 what my sensations were no language can describe； but just as they all rose； stifling my breath and constricting my throat； a girl came up and passed me： in passing； she lifted her eyes。 what a strange light inspired them！ what an extraordinary sensation that ray sent through me！ how the new feeling bore me up！ it was as if a martyr； a hero； had passed a slave or victim； and imparted strength in the transit。 i mastered the rising hysteria； lifted up my head； and took a firm stand on the stool。 helen burns asked some slight question about her work of miss smith； was chidden for the triviality of the inquiry； returned to her place； and smiled at me as she again went by。 what a smile！ i remember it now； and i know that it was the effluence of fine intellect； of true courage； it lit up her marked lineaments； her thin face； her sunken grey eye； like a reflection from the aspect of an angel。 yet at that moment helen burns wore on her arm “the untidy badge；” scarcely an hour ago i had heard her condemned by miss scatcherd to a dinner of bread and water on th