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was waiting for something from me。 Ah； she d asked for our drink order。 I continued to stare at Bella； and the waitress grudgingly turned to look at her； too。 I ll have a coke？ Bella said； as if asking for approval。 Two cokes； I amended。 Thirst normal； human thirst was a sign of shock。 make sure she had the extra sugar from the soda in her system。 She looked healthy； though。 More than healthy。 She looked radiant。 I was vaguely aware I would What？ she demanded wondering why I was staring； I guessed。 that the waitress had left。 How are you feeling？ I asked。 She blinked； surprised by the question。 You don t feel dizzy； sick； cold？ She was even more confused now。 Should I？ I m fine。
Well； I actually I m waiting for you to go into shock。 her denial。 She would not want to be taken care of。 I halfsmiled； expecting She looked It took her a minute to answer me。 Her eyes were slightly unfocused。 that way sometimes； when I smiled at her。 Was she dazzled？ I would love to believe that。 I don t think that will happen。 I ve always been very good at repressing unpleasant things； she answered； a little breathless。 Did she have a lot of practice with unpleasant things； then？ this hazardous？ Just the same； I told her。 in you。 Was her life always I ll feel better when you have some sugar and food The waitress returned with the cokes and a basket of bread。 She put them in front of me； and asked for my order； trying to catch my eye in the process。 I indicated that she should attend to Bella； and then went back to tuning her out。 She had a vulgar mind。 Um Bella glanced quickly at the menu。 I ll have the mushroom ravioli。 The waitress turned back to me eagerly。 Nothing for me。 Bella made a slight face。 Hmm。 She must have noticed that I never ate food。 noticed everything。 And I always forgot to be careful around her。 I waited till we were alone again。 Drink； I insisted。 I was surprised when she plied immediately and without objection。 She drank until the glass was entirely empty； so I pushed the second coke toward her； frowning a little。 Thirst； or shock？ She drank a little more； and then shuddered once。 Are you cold？ It s just the coke； she said； but she shivered again； her lips trembling slightly as if her teeth were about to chatter。 The pretty blouse she wore looked too thin to protect her adequately； it clung to her like a second skin； almost as fragile as the first。 She was so frail； so mortal。 Don t you have a jacket？ Yes。 car。 She looked around herself； a little perplexed。 Oh I left it in Jessica s She And you？ I pulled off my jacket； wishing that the gesture was not marred by my body temperature。 It would have been nice to have been able to offer her a warm coat。 She stared at me； her cheeks warming again。 What was she thinking now？ I handed her the jacket across the table； and she put it on at once； and then shuddered again。
Yes； it would be very nice to be warm。 Thanks； she said。 She took a deep breath； and then pushed the toolong sleeves back to free her hands。 She took another deep breath。 Was the evening finally settling in？ Her color was still good； her skin was cream and roses against the deep blue of her shirt。 That color blue looks lovely with your skin； I plimented her。 Just being honest。 She flushed； enhancing the effect。 She looked well； but there was no point in taking chances。 bread toward her。 Really； she objected； guessing my motives。 I pushed the basket of I m not going into shock。 You should be a normal person would be。 You don t even look shaken。 I stared at her； disapproving； wondering why she couldn t be normal and then wondering if really wanted her to be that way。 I feel very safe with you； she said； her eyes； again； filled with trust。 I didn t deserve。 Trust Her instincts were all wrong backwards。 That must be the problem。 She didn t recognize danger the way a human being should be able to。 She had the opposite reaction。 Instead of running； she lingered； drawn to what should frighten her How could I protect her from myself when neither of us wanted that？ This is more plicated than I d planned； I murmured。 I could see her turning my words over in her head； and I wondered what she made of them。 She took a breadstick and began to eat without seeming aware of the action。 She chewed for a moment； and then leaned her head to one side thoughtfully。 Usually you re in a better mood when your eyes are so light； she said in a casual tone。 Her observation； stated so matter of factly； left me reeling。 What？ I have a I felt a deep You re always crabbier when your eyes are black I expect it then。 theory about that； she added lightly。 So she had e up with her own explanation。 Of course she had。 sense of dread as I wondered how close she d e to the truth。 More theories？ Mmhm。 She chewed on another bite； entirely nonchalant。 As if she weren t discussing the aspects of a monster with the monster himself。 I hope you were more creative this time I lied when she didn t continue。 What I really hoped was that she was wrong miles wide of the mark。 still stealing from ic books？ Or are you
Well； no； I didn t get it from a ic book； she said； a little embarrassed。 But I didn t e up with it on my own； either。 And？ I asked between my teeth。 Surely should would not speak so calmly if she were about to scream。 As she hesitated； biting her lip； the waitress reappeared with Bella s food。 I paid the server little attention as she set the plate in front of Bella and then asked if I wanted anything。 I declined； but asked for more coke。 glasses。 She took them and left。 The waitress hadn t noticed the empty You were saying？ I prompted anxiously as soon as we were alone again。 I ll tell you about it in the car； she said in a low voice。 Ah； this would be bad。 She wasn t willing to speak her guesses around others。 If she tacked on suddenly。 There are conditions？ I was so tense I almost growled the words。 I do have a few questions； of course。 Of course； I agreed； my voice hard。 Her questions would probably be enough to tell me where her thoughts were heading。 But how would I answer them？ With responsible lies？ Or would I drive her away with truth？ Or would I say nothing； unable to decide？ We sat in silence while the waitress replenished her supply of