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brushed my teeth meticulously； twice。 Then I washed my face and splashed water on the back of my
neck； which was feeling feverish。 That felt so good that I washed my arms as well； and finally I decided
to just give up and take the shower。 I knew it was ridiculous to shower before swimming； but I needed to
calm down； and hot water was one reliable way to do that。
Also； shaving my legs again seemed like a pretty good idea。
When I was done； I grabbed a huge white towel off the counter and wrapped it under my arms。
Then I was faced with a dilemma I hadn't considered。 What was I supposed to put on？ Not a swimsuit；
obviously。 But it seemed silly to put my clothes back on； too。 I didn't even want to think about the things
Alice had packed for me。
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My breathing started to accelerate again and my hands trembled—so much for the calming effects of the
shower。 I started to feel a little dizzy； apparently a fullscale panic attack on the way。 I sat down on the
cool tile floor in my big towel and put my head between my knees。 I prayed he wouldn't decide to e
look for me before I could pull myself together。 I could imagine what he would think if he saw me going
to pieces this way。 It wouldn't be hard for him to convince himself that we were making a mistake。
And I wasn't freaking out because I thought we were making a mistake。 Not atall。 I was freaking out
because I had no idea how to do this； and I was afraid to walk out of this room and face the unknown。
Especially in French lingerie。 I knew I wasn't ready for that yet
This felt exactly like having to walk out in front of a theater full of thousands with no idea what my lines
were。
How did people do this—swallowall their fears and trust someone else so implicitly with every
imperfection and fear they had—with less than the absolute mitment Edward had given me？ if it
weren't Edward out there； if I didn't know in every cell of my body that he loved me as much as I loved
him—unconditionally and irrevocably and； to be honest； irrationally—I'd never be able to get up off this
floor。
But it was Edward out there； so I whispered the words 〃Don't be a coward〃 under my breath and
scrambled to my feet。 I hitched the towel tighter under my arms and marched determinedly from the
bathroom。 Past the suitcase full of lace and the big bed without looking at either。 Out the open glass door
onto the powderfine sand。
Everything was blackandwhite； leached colorless by the moon。 I walked slowly across the warm
powder； pausing beside the curved tree where he had left his clothes。 I laid my hand against the rough
bark and checked my breathing to make sure it was even。 Or even enough。
I looked across the low ripples； black in the darkness； searching for him。
He wasn't hard to find。 He stood； his back to me； waist deep in the midnight water； staring up at the oval
moon。 The pallid light of the moon turned his skin a perfect white； like the sand； like the moon itself； and
made his wet hair black as the ocean。 He was motionless； his hands resting palms down against the
water； the low waves broke around him as if he were a stone。 I stared at the smooth lines of his back； his
shoulders； his arms； his neck； theflawless shape of him。。。。
The fire was no longer a flash burn across my skin—it was slow and deep now； it smoldered away all
my awkwardness； my shy uncertainty。 I slipped the towel off without hesitation； leaving it on the tree with
his clothes； and walked out into the white light； it made me pale as the snowy sand； too。
I couldn't hear the sound of my footsteps as I walked to the water's edge； but I guessed that he could。
Edward did not turn。 I let the gentle swells break over my toes； and found that he'd been right about the
temperature—it was very warm； like bath water。 I stepped in； walking carefully across the invisible ocean
floor； but my care was unnecessary； the sand continued perfectly smooth； sloping gently toward Edward。
I waded through the weightless
current till I was at his side； and then I placed my hand lightly over his cool hand lying on the water。
〃Beautiful；〃 I said； looking up at the moon； too。
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〃It's all right；〃 he answered； unimpressed。 He turned slowly to face me； little waves rolled away from his
movement and broke against my skin。 His eyes looked silver in his icecolored face。 He twisted his hand
up so that he could twine our fingers beneath the surface of the water。 It was warm enough that his cool
skin did not raise goose bumps on mine。
〃But I wouldn't use the word beautiful〃 he continued。 〃Not with you standing here in parison。〃
I halfsmiled； then raised my free hand—it didn't tremble now—and placed it over his heart。 White on
white； we matched； for once。 He shuddered the tiniest bit at my warm touch。 His breath came rougher
now。
〃I promised we would try〃 he whispered； suddenly tense。 〃If。。。 if I do something wrong； if I hurt you；
you must tell me at once。〃
I nodded solemnly； keeping my eyes on his。 I took another step through the waves and leaned my head
against his chest。
〃Don't be afraid；〃 I murmured。 〃We belong together。〃
I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words。 This moment was so perfect； so right； there
was no way to doubt it。
His arms wrapped around me； holding me against him； summer and winter。 It felt like every nerve ending
in my body was a live wire。
〃Forever；〃 he agreed； and then pulled us gently into deeper water。
The sun； hot on the bare skin of my back； woke me in the morning。 Late morning； maybe afternoon； I
wasn't sure。 Everything besides the time was clear； though； I knew exactly where I was—the bright room
with the big white bed； brilliant sunlight streaming through the open doors。 The clouds of ting would
soften the shine。
I didn't open my eyes。 I was too happy to change anything； no matter how small。 The only sounds were
the waves outside； our breathing； my heartbea